Love Addiction May Create Similar Brain Activity as Drug Addiction
Though the phrase "addicted to love" can spur many people into instant humming of rocker Robert Palmer's signature late-1980s tune, love addiction is a serious condition with similarities to compulsive disorders
Love addiction is often explored within the context of other destructive conditions such as sexual addiction and hypersexuality, and shown in celebrity headlines and movies to be harmless or comical. The reality, however, is anything but humorous for people who live with an addiction to relationship after relationship or partner after partner. Often the person has suffered emotional neglect or abuse, or may have been a victim of physical abuse.
The romantic elements of a relationship aren't typically the basis for love addiction. Instead, experts believe the addiction may develop when a person experiences a less-than-adequate level of affection as a child, is emotionally separated from family members, or has deep-seeded insecurities and long-held fears of being rejected, among other triggers.
Scientific research, such as studies from Rutgers University's Dr. Helen Fisher, is addressing the chemical and biological linkages to romantic addictions and desires. Using brain imagery techniques, Fisher explored brain reactions of people when they were shown a photo of the person with whom they are involved in a romantic relationship. The patterns of brain activation were similar to patterns observed through brain imaging of a person with a substance addiction.
In fact, Fisher compared the patterns to when patients are high on cocaine. Those in the study who were in infatuation mode lost sleep, had distorted perceptions toward time, and were completely focused on the object of their love no matter their surroundings. Other experts, such as psychologist Brenda Schaeffer, say for many people, the conditions are right for developing a love addiction – although the condition hasn't yet been officially listed in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.
In many cases, people with love addiction will be unable to stop themselves from assuming their partner's identity, a reflection of their low self-image and an underdeveloped sense of self. People with a love addiction may also have a sexual addiction, demonstrated by a compulsion to have sex with multiple partners or obsessive behaviors toward Internet pornography or paid sexual services. Similar to love addiction, sexual addiction may not be about the sexual pleasure itself, but rather is connected to a person's deeply rooted inability to form or maintain close intimate relationships.
Symptoms of love addiction can include a lack of trust in personal relationships and a persistent anger or bitterness toward the level of love or affection they received as a child. They may show signs of depression, participate in risky actions or have simultaneous addictions to alcohol or drugs. Denial of the problem is often present, and the person with a love addiction may move quickly to create another romantic relationship when one is finished.
Throughout the repeated romantic relationships, a person with a love addiction may live in a cycle marked by dissatisfaction, being afraid and being dependent on another person for their sense of satisfaction or value. They may also continue to grieve over the conclusion of a romantic relationship for several months or several years, with escalated feelings in comparison to people who do not have an addiction to love.
Treatment for love addiction can be similar to sexual addiction treatment, including professional assistance to learn new ways to cope with stressful emotions and how to divert the triggers that may keep a person from reaching recovery.
